rymenhild

( Who's in my university press anthology of collected essays? )

Thank you, cataptromancer!

mechaieh asked, "Which five characters in fiction did/do you most want to assassinate (or, at minimum, signficantly maim), and with what?"

Here are the four I could think of on short notice:

4. Camilla n'ha Kyria, Marion Zimmer Bradley's Darkover books. Yes, I know you had a horrid past and all, but stop looking grimly and stoically tragic about your degendered self, woman, or I'll take your inch-and-a-half-too-short-to-be-a-sword and... let you kill me. Never mind, that's not a good plan. I can still wish Magda ended up with Jaelle, though.

3. Joshua, Arm of the Starfish, Madeleine L'Engle. Joshua is the ideal human being. He is beautiful, filled with love for all creation, and walks around or flies his little airplane with a big sign over his head marked "Sacrificial Lamb". Kill him sooner and save us the agony and allegory. Maybe he could have a plane crash.

2. Daystar, Talking to Dragons by Patricia Wrede. Daystar's mother kicks wizard rear ends from the Mountains of Morning to the Enchanted Forest and back again. Daystar's father at least attempts self-sufficiency in an endearing manner. Daystar himself is just boring and confused, and ought to be roasted over dragonfire until he acquires some flavor and texture.

1. Pamela, from Samuel Richardson's book by that name. Alas, woe, poor Pamela will lose her chastity. Eventually. In three hundred pages. When she marries him. Then the book goes on for two hundred more pages after that...! The book would be much improved if, near the beginning, someone had taken a spork to Pamela's true, precious jewel, the one that could never be replaced.